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REVIEW: Wrong Man, Right Kiss by Red Garnier

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LynneC’s review of Wrong Man, Right Kiss by Red Garnier
Contemporary Romance published by Harlequin Desire 6 Aug 13

The premise of this story is an interesting one, verging on the “oh please” unbelievable, but I went along with it for the read. However, because of certain elements in the story, it isn’t a book I’d enjoy revisiting and it ended up more as a “must finish” rather than a “want to finish.”

Molly has known the Gage brothers since childhood, and she’s close friends with Julian. When one of them kisses and fondles her at a party, she believes she’s met her soul mate, but because they were in fancy dress, she mistakes one brother for another and goes to Julian for help. Julian is the one who kissed her, and he’s more than miffed that she didn’t recognize him, but he agrees to help her seduce his older brother. Julian’s her old playmate, and he has a gazillion pet names for her, so the friends to lovers has more than a bit of ick for me.

Julian is a player. Of course, there is a deep reason why he doesn’t let himself get involved with the women he sleeps with, but he’s a big player, and a lot of women cross his bedroom floor. More ick. Right from the start. Molly comes to see him as a woman is leaving his bedroom, but it doesn’t faze her because she’s not involved with him, right?
Sure.

Julian is a gorgeous blond, and the Beckham comparison is made more than a few times, although Becks left his blond phase behind a while ago. He’s all about the mid-browns these days. Becks is good looking, but even though I’m a huge Man U fan, (his best years were with Man U, and he had the famed number seven jersey. The man could place a ball on a sixpence) he’s never done it for me. He’s pretty, but that voice was a big liability until he learned to lower it.  (A before listen: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IuUrSrIZnMc) I could accept a reference, but it comes up too much and interfers with my reading (if we’re talking blonds, then I’m more of a Daniel Craig girl!)

I don’t particularly like Julian. He’s a player, but he expects his family to take him seriously, and instead of confronting them, or trying to prove his worth, he goes off and decides to do his own thing, although I’m not quite sure what that thing is, except it involved getting Molly to decorate the reception area and meant that she is endearingly covered with paint when she isn’t dressed up to the nines. Here’s his excuse:

“Julian had told himself time and again that he didn’t care. And once he was an adult, they’d made him believe he was a playboy until he had no other choice but to play the part.”

Molly is a fabulously popular artist whose paintings, in the throw-it-at-the-wall style, are very expensive. I don’t believe that, either, because even splash-em paintings have to have some depth of character to them to be interesting, unless she is more fashionable than good. I mean, I love Jeff Koons’ work, but he’s as much marketing as he is artistic. Molly is very light and has a childish, rather than childlike, attitude, which gets quite annoying quite fast. She finds all Julian’s pet names for her endearing. I’d have slapped him. He calls her “Mo-Po, Mopey, Moo, Molls, Mo-Mo, Moo-Moo…” in a patronizing way that would get him off my Christmas card list pronto, Becks or not. How can you take someone seriously who does that? Molly’s favourite book is The Princess Bride. Really? She compares Julian to Westley at one point. Maybe I’m missing something, but I thought it was largely aimed at children. Mind you, I always did think I was missing something about that book. Basically, Molly is a brilliant, successful artist, she’s an orphan, she is ashamed of her big breasts, she’s a bit juvenile with no depth of character. She’s a Mary Sue. Her only flaws are really assets.

Of course they do the deed, and the night she loses her virginity to Julian (what, you didn’t realize she was a virgin?), they do it five times. Ouch and double ouch. Walking bandy time. It seems to be a trait of the Harlequin newly ex-virgin. I like to think of them all staggering down to the office, wincing when they move, with big grins on their faces.

This an example of a writer who writes really well, has a great writing voice but who irritates me. Her style seems too forced and imposes on the narrative too much for me to settle inside the story. Difficult to explain, but it’s so strong that the individual voices of the characters have difficulty getting through. Also, I find the premise unpleasant. The heroine has been brought up with the hero and his twin and decides that she loves one of them. She asks the other to help her seduce him. Or is it just me who finds that more than somewhat disturbing?

LynneCs iconGrade: C-

Summary:

What happens when the masks come off?

When one of the supersexy Gage brothers blows Molly Devaney away with a scorching kiss at a masquerade ball, she thinks she’s met her soul mate. But why does her masked seducer act as if she doesn’t exist the next day? To win him over, she’ll make him jealous, so she turns to his brother Julian Gage, who offers to play the role of her lover.

But Julian is playing for keeps. There’s nothing fake about the way this woman makes him feel, and now he’s going to show her just which Gage brother is right for her….

Read an excerpt.


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